Day 1...again

It's a new year, and with that, I recommit to a plan. When I first started doing what turned out to be the right thing for me, it was summer. As predicted, as soon as I returned to work, the "habits" I entertained on summer schedule didn't translate well to my job schedule, routine, or stress level. Bit by bit, my success deteriorated. I still ended the year with a 12 pound deficit from where I originally embraced some form of determination to make this thing happen. I've never given up, but felt defeated from time to time, each blow making me a little weaker. I resolved to get through the holidays, enjoy them (and by saying that, I do not mean my plan was to approach food with wild abandon), and begin again. I made modifications to what I've done in the past. Baked goods were still baked, but I stored them in the garage where it was near freezing or below. I was far less likely to graze, and even less likely than that to bother finding shoes to run out on the cold concrete to retrieve something. It just wasn't worth it. I drank hot tea more often to fill the void.
Now that the new year (clean slate) has arrived, I decided I'd make a conscious decision every day to do something positive towards my goal. So yesterday, I pulled out my journal where I successfully logged my foods and calories through the summer. I started a fresh section, packed my lunch for today and recorded the foods and calories. I also measured out my lunch portions of homemade minestrone soup for the remainder of the week. To that I'll add a 100 calorie yogurt and an apple each day, weighing the apple of course. Today I made several positive choices: I took the stairs on several occasions and only used the elevator at the end of the day when my knee was rebelling from returning to work. I ate my lunch at lunch time rather than eating early during my planning period. When I got home, I was hungry, but could still make thoughtful, wise decisions. I prepared myself a snack: 30g crackers, 1.5 oz American cheese and 1.5 oz beef less bologna. I weighed it and recorded it before I'd allow myself to eat it. My thought as I did so was, "I'm worth this!" I'm currently enjoying an enormous glass of decaf iced tea sweetened with splenda. Supper will be a challenge since we still have leftovers from our New Years feast. OH! That's the other thing! While the snack had me feeling empowered, I packed up all the remaining cake, cookies, candy, etc and prepared a box to take to work. I'll leave it in the teacher's lounge, fill my coffee cup, and be gone. I'm telling myself "their gain will be my loss". Nasty, I know, but if it helps me achieve my goal and humors me along the way, so be it. So I think my strides are pretty great for this only being day 2 in thought, day 1 in deed. It's not like I don't know what to do, and I do recall how much better I truly did feel when I was behaving. My knees hurt less, I could move better, I could last longer, and I enjoyed buying smaller clothes. The slate is clean, and I'm the only person allowed to write on it. It's my choice. I'm doing this for ME. Nothing tastes as good as feeling good feels...my Momma said that, so it must be true. :)