Sorry I missed yesterday. I got distracted. I stayed on my diet and under 1500 calories, but I was mad. My feelings got hurt by a total stranger, and I was left not knowing what to do with my emotions, and fought to stay out of the kitchen, wanting something to numb the pain. This person had made nasty reference to someone specific to some woman's weight, my weight being the same as hers. I won't go into any more detail or I'll just get pissed off again, but it was hurtful...'nuf said. I e-mailed my FB friend, Kenlie, and she immediately responded with calm, rational advice that unruffled my feathers, which allowed me to measure a half glass of wine to use up my remaining calories for the day and crawl in bed.
Today was fine. I got into a good routine this week, and the key was preparation to my relationship with food. I'll have to reload supplies this weekend, but the breakfast cheesecakes and blueberries were a daily thing, as was the turkey breast at lunch. Supper required more effort, and some days it was a stretch to make it from lunch to supper without a snack, but the final products were both tasty and attractive and kept me within my calorie perimeters. A new recipe perked things up mid-week.
Tonight I'm a little wiggy and cannot seem to escape things that make my blood pressure rise. My son is having car trouble with a car my ex-husband provided for him, so now there's talk of selling the vehicle, shopping for something used, yada, yada, yada; my son is currently obsessed with looking at SUVs on the internet, like THAT's gonna happen, and the tv is too loud, the dogs are barking, my Christmas tree is still up and lit (though the ornaments have been off for 2 days...so, that's something), I'm out of laundry detergent, and I'm savouring the last inch of wine in my glass because once it's gone I only have 114 calories left for the day. It's almost 8pm...I can do this. I weighed this morning, and though the scale is moving, I thought it would look better. I'm not going to fret...it doesn't get carved in stone until Monday. My husband is saying something, but it's like the teacher's voice on Charlie Brown specials...I need to take a deep breath and tune it all out. I have yet to change gears from the hectic day at work, and I don't see it happening any time soon. I'm going to go read, somewhere far away from the tv, dogs, and men talking about cars.
I live somewhere where an SUV is needed. C-town is not that place. (Neither one of them. Also? He won't be allowed a car as a freshman. And you can live 4 great years in C-town [which is not actually what we called it :)] without a car, if you stay in dorms or in any sane part of town--in fact, a car's expensive, inconvenient, and a TERRIBLE way to get to class. There's a free bus to the Downtown shops and to the shopping center and to anywhere else you might want to go.)
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